I turned on the television the other day, as you do, when to my surprise I saw that there was a Gaelic programme showing on BBC2. That in itself was not surprising, for the BBC are prone to promoting Gaelic and other such indecipherable pap during prime time, presumably to emphasise their cultural diversity and save on having to invest in costlier programmes that people might actually want to watch. No, what was surprising about this Gaelic programme was the name of it. Unless the people who programme the Sky TV viewing guide were having a laugh, then the gobbledygook I was watching was called Cunntas. That’s right, Cunntas. Although something of a neophyte when it comes to the Gaelic language, I would hazard a guess that it is pronounced exactly as it written - 'cunt-ass'. Get your tongue around that one.